The 5 Lessons I Really Learned In 2020
The 5 lessons I really learned in 2020
2020 is almost over! What the hell just happened?
This year we’ve had a pandemic, social uprisings in support of the black lives matter movement, an election, and hurricanes and wildfires… all in just the United States. Inside each of our homes, we’ve all experienced massive transformations and shifts in our work lives and in our personal lives.
For all of us, it has been a truly chaotic and unique year. For me? No different. I started my business, quit my engineering job, and started traveling full-time. That’s why I wanted to share with you the five biggest lessons that I learned this year in my business and in my personal life, after taking some time to reflect*.
*As a caveat, if you are still processing and grieving you don't need to go searching for the lessons or always find the positive. You are allowed to feel angry, upset, or have any other feeling. Grief is normal.
Lesson #1: You’ll never feel totally ready
So my first lesson of 2020 is that no matter how “ready” financially, mentally, or emotionally you are, it is always going to be terrifying to leave your “safe” 9 to 5.
There is a huge wave of people who are building a business from their cubicles, excited and hoping for the day when they’ll be ready to leave their 9 to 5.
This year was the year that my husband and I had prepared to take a “sabbatical”, if you will, move and travel around the world and spend time with family.
When COVID hit, obviously we were not able to backpack Europe. But, we still chose to give away the majority of the material things that we had, move closer to family, spend time with them, rest, and take care of ourselves.
When it came down to the last remaining weeks at my job, I was a stress ball. I cried a ton. I couldn't think about anything else and it was so scary.
If you are an entrepreneur who is dying for the day when you’ll leave your 9 to 5, no matter how much you prepare, the moment that it happens will probably still feel terrifying. At least it did for me.
The lesson is, be prepared to not feel prepared. And do it anyway.
Lesson #2: Less truly is better
I finished my time management coaching training in January of 2020, then immediately started working with business owners. The common theme?
Saying “no” or pruning things is the key to making the most of our time.
This was the year that I truly, truly learned that, and maybe you did as well.
When COVID really locked us down in the US in March, I was stripped of driving to my 9 to 5. I stopped teaching yoga multiple times a week. Going out and hanging out with friends or eating out was not possible.
The only things I had to do were work my 9 to 5 job, take care of myself, and grow my business.
Those were the three main priorities that I had. Everything else basically vanished almost overnight. This allowed me to grow my business fairly fast while still being able to take care of myself, spend time with my husband, cook (I love cooking), clean (also love cleaning).
2020 was the year of learning the importance and impact of actually saying no.
Lesson #3: Working too much stops you from being you
When I work all the time, focus only on checking things off my to-do list, and trying to get further ahead in my business and life… I lose myself.
I forget how to slow down, rest, and just be me.
Then after I would lose myself, trying to slow down and rest would feel impossible. I would justify it by saying, “I am working a 9 to 5, growing a business, and have all the other life stuff to take care of… I’ll slow down when I leave my 9 to 5.”
Before this year, I didn’t really know what true rest was. Even though I knew all of the science and facts that resting was going to make me more productive and intentionally happy, I still couldn't “do” it.
I finally learned what it feels like to rest, and how to work towards my goals without losing myself.
In the beginning, it wasn't pretty. In order for me to rest, I had to compassionately, and sort of forcefully, make myself rest. I had to make it a non-negotiable in my schedule even if I was working on things.
I am so grateful to have a somatic therapist who is helping me slow down and rest in a compassionate and gentle way.
Once I was able to let go of my “tight grip” around needing to do more and more, it really opened up my body, my heart, and my mind in a way that I've never been able to experience before.
I created the space that I was always after by going inwards.
So, no matter how much you know you're supposed to slow down and rest, it can still be extremely hard. Having support from those around me was key.
Want to enjoy the freedom and flexibility that you are craving? I’d love to help. Click here to read about working with me.
Lesson #4: Let your values values lead the way
This year has been eye-opening for me on what my core values are, what I believe in, how I stand and show up in those values.
I believe we, as a society, are slowly starting to realize that, not living in our values and communicating about all the important issues we're facing are preventing us from healing, growing, and actually changing as a society.
As a result of resting and properly taking care of myself, I was able to explore, go inwards, and grow a ton (see lesson #3).
Then, I was able to hire Bear Hebert, a radical business consultant, who was able to bring my values and who I am into my business.
Just like in my business, making sure that I spend my time in alignment with my core values, is equally important.
When I wasn’t clear on my core values and how to create a business and life around them, I felt lost. Now, I feel a lot less lost.
Lesson #5: Reckoning with my privilege
I learned how my privilege and my whiteness have advantaged me and my life, and at the same time contributed to the oppression of other groups and communities of people.
2020 has been a year of racial reckoning in the United States and some would say the globe as well. Due to the social uprisings in support of the black lives matter movement this year, I was able to confront my privilege in a deeper way than ever before.
I learned more about the oppressive laws structures and racist policies that our country still has in place, and continues to approve, that have done harm and continue to do harm against BIPOC communities across our country.
As I continue to listen and learn from anti-racism educators, listen to other people's experiences, and process my own lived experiences, I have been able to use my privilege to support and uplift the voices of black entrepreneurs across the country.
I've been able to take everything I have learned, processed, and continue to learn and apply it to what I do as a holistic time coach.
If you are reading this lesson and you are white or have white privilege reach out if you have any questions. We can start a dialogue around how to use our privilege to make this world more equitable.
What did you learn?
Those were my five biggest lessons of 2020. Pretty big lessons, right?
If you haven't checked it out already, I have another blog with some self-reflection questions that will help you end this year in a grounded space and start the new year prepared and aligned. Click here to read it.
I’d love to hear what your biggest lessons were! Share in the comment section below or send me an email.